National Politician Performance Awards (NAPPY) Bahamas

National Politician Performance Awards (NAPPY) Bahamas

> > The awards season is upon us and as we await the GRAMMYS, OSCARS etc. let's
not forget the NAPPY awards

> > The 2003 Bahamas National Politician Performance (NAPPY) Awards



> > The Jerry Roker award goes to Fred Mitchell award - because ya can> '> t
find him in town

> > The Stealth Award goes to Frank Smith, Kenyatta Gibson and Neville Adderley.
Like the stealth airplanes you know they are out there somewhere but they never
show up on any radar.

> > The > "> Which way is up? > ">  Award goes to Neville Wisdom, who when he
found himself in a hole chose to get a bigger shovel rather than stop digging.

> > The > "> Stop pissing on me and telling me it> '> s raining> "> Award goes
to the PLP government from the Bahamian people who now all realize that they
should not have believed the 2002 campaign promise to > "> just put the head in>

> > The > "> Mort Goldstein Excellence in Business> "> Award goes to Frankie
Wilson who continues to amass a fortune by proving the old adage > "> in a gold
rush, it> '> s not usually the miners who get rich, it> '> s the guy selling the
maps, picks and shovels> ">

> > The Milton Bradley Award goes to Sidney Stubbs, Not only does he still owes
$52,000 for the trip to China. But, also has the gall to continue to claim
innocence in the Korean fishing boats scandal in the face of overwhelming
evidence to the contrary. Not to mention abusing credit cards, vehicles hotel
rooms etc. So many games so little time.

> > The Dragon Award goes to Raynard Rigby who puts out so much useless hot air
he must be a fire breather

> > The Janus Award goes to all those who professed to hate foreigners during
the last campaign as opposition yet now actively begging, pursuing and praising
foreign investors. Making concessions, kissing Asses etc

> > (P.S. If you don> '> t know, take the time to look up who was Janus)

> > The > '> Check is in the mail> "> Award goes to Leslie Miller. How can
someone who makes so much continue to owe so many? Pray that he never becomes
Minister of Finance. Did anyone bother to do a credit check beforehand?

> > The GQ/Photogenic Award goes to Ron Pinder for consistently being the best
dressed, (and best smelling) MP male or female. Mr. Pinder has never met a camera
he did n> '> t like. There were reports that Mr. Pinder once turned down the
chance for a photo op. But, that turned out to be false FNM propaganda.

> > The > "> Hooked on phonics> "> Award goes to Bradley Roberts who the
remarkable ability to get things done > ...> if only he could get through a
speech and make it sound like his own.

> > The "See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil" Award goes to Vincent Peete
and V.Alfred Gray who stood by while the Korean boat deal went down. They claim
no foreknowledge yet approval was given by each of their ministries.

> > The > "> Da Nile is not just a river in Egypt> "> Award goes to Perry
Christie for the immortal quote > "> What sissies? ain> '> t no sissies in my
Government> ">. Runner-up Sidney Stubbs for the quote > "> The Prime Minister
never asked me resign> ">.

> > The > "> Sherlock Holmes Get a clue> "> - Award goes to Glennis Hanna-Martin
who despite being very smart and having of what is considered the > '> easiest
ministry> '> along with an extremely competent permanent secretary at her
disposal does not appear to have a clue.

> > The "Poor Taste" Award is a tie between DPM Cynthia Pratt and Kenneth
Russell who both tried to get political points of the Grand Bahama child

> > The "Harry Houdini Great Escape" Award goes to Sidney Stubbs for avoiding
prosecution in the Korean Boat deal. Even though Minister Gray stated that laws
had been broken and false documents filed. >

> > The > "> Now you see him now you don> '> t> "> Award goes to Dion Foulkes
who disappeared off the scene faster than black man who stumbled on a KKK rally.

> > The > "> I> '> ve got friends in low places> "> Award goes to Phillip > '>
Brave> '> Davis for showing that not only does crime pay, but it pays very
well> ...> if you have the right clients.

> > The "Johnny Cochrane" Award goes to Michael Barnett who has represented Sir
Lynden, Hubert Ingraham and now Perry Christie. Someone needs to suggest him for
QC or PC.

> > [Side note: In all recorded history, there has never been a reported case of
an attorney being bitten by a snake> ...>. apparently snakes are not

> > The "Ready Fire Aim" Award goes to Neville Wisdom who just never seems to
think things all the way through before taking action. Mr. shoot first ask
questions later.

> > The "Ready Aim Aim" Award goes to Perry Christie, who always seems cocked
and ready but can never > '> pull the trigger> '>.

> > The > "> Balls on a priest - tits on a nun> "> Award aka > "> The most
useless appendage> "> Award goes to Koed Smith maybe we do need an Ambassador
to the Environment but first someone needs to explain what he does, and with
what authority

> > The "Albert Einstein Great Idea" Award goes to PM Christie for the brilliant
idea that both Minister of Education and Attorney General are part time jobs,
even though both our Justice and Education systems continue to be in shambles.
Runner-up was Alfred Sears who let Mr. Christie talk him into trying to prove

> > .The "Most Unknown Quantity" Award goes to Hubert Ingraham, as the
proverbial snake in the grass. You never know when he will strike. But you know
his venom can be fatal.

> > The "Steve Urkel" Award goes to Tommy Turnquest. He is a genius trapped in a
nerd> '> s persona, if he can only make the change to Stefan (the > '> cool> '>
alter ego) he> '> ll be PM. Perhaps a > "> Maury Povich makeover> ">.
> >

> > The "Iraqi Scud Missile" Award goes to Whitney Bastian, He always seems to
hit something but you> '> re never quite sure what he was aiming at.

> > The > "> 10% of something is better than 100% of nothing> "> Award goes to
Tennyson Wells. Mr. Wells has been a total disappointment as an independent. He
was much more effective when he was a part of a political party.

> > The > "> Cat got your tongue? > ">  Award goes to Bishop Neil Ellis, who has
lately been uncharacteristically silent and absent from the PM> '> s entourage.

> > The > "> Didn't you used to be somebody important? > ">  Award goes to B J
Nottage. Who is struggling to stay relevant? But was a runner-up for the > ">
unknown quantity > "> award. Runner-Up: A seven-way tie ex- FNM Cabinet

> > The > "> Emperor> '> s new clothes> "> Award goes to all those MP> '> s who
stood up in the House of Assembly and with a straight face commended Neville
Wisdom for the great job he did with the 2002/2003 junkanoo. Let> '> s get

> > The > "> Dionne Warwick - Promises, Promises> "> Award goes to Allison
Maynard Gibson who> '> s ministry has yet to successfully implement one
significant foreign investment project despite continuous promises. Special
mention should go to PM Christie for his promise during the 2003 PLP convention
that > "> his government would announce billions of dollars before the end of
the year> "> we assume that he meant 2003. We> '> re still waiting

> > The > "> gee Toto, I don> '> t think we are in Kansas anymore > "> Award
goes to Perry Christie and Mother Pratt who must by now realize that this was
not the ride they signed up for.

> > The > "> You can dress 'em up, but you can> '> t take ‘em out? > ">  Award goes
to Melanie Griffiths who> '> s demeanor (or lack of) during the debate on the
Willamae Pratt fire showed she still has along way to go.

> > The > "> Blood is thicker than water> "> Award goes to Sidney Stubbs for >
'> hooking up> '> his best friend, his brother in-law and his cousin in a
single move.

> > The > "> At least wait 'til the body is cold> "> Award goes to all those
wannabe PLP candidates who have recently been seen hovering over the Holy Cross
constituency like vultures. >

> > The > "> At least you could use some Vaseline or K-Y > "> Award goes to all
those cabinet ministers and other government officials who are using their
influence business to their old law firms, or have the government
rent their property, or award government contracts for > '> kickbacks> '>, or
to get work permits approved in 2 or 3 days or to travel around the world first
class or tending to their own private businesses on government time.

> > The "Barney Fife Award" goes to Alfred Sears. Runner up Frank Watson no
explanations required
> >